Curiosity is the Answer
After 20+ years of working in corporate fashion design, I developed a lot of routines based on what I thought was expected of me - but they weren’t actually good for my mental, physical, emotional or spiritual health.
Over the last few years I’ve gradually been able to hear and reacquaint myself with the kind, loving voice that’s always been inside of me - attempting to offer guidance. During this time of growth, I’ve slowly felt safe allowing myself to believe in my inner intelligence - which I now know to be clear and trustworthy.
As I quiet my nervous system I can separate myself from the story of who I am - the version that was written by others. From this more accurate perspective I’ve gained awareness of all that my Spirit set into motion while I was unaware, busy and feeling stuck in confusion.
Without fully realizing what I was growing - I’d gone to classes and received training that would become the foundational information I would eventually use to help myself heal. Now, in hindsight, I see how my spirit was collecting resources for me to use on a future journey.
I believe this is how it works for all of us when we choose to follow our natural interests and curiosities. We don’t need to know how it will benefit us later in order for it to blossom into beautiful solutions down the road.
All it asks is that we practice patience and allow ourselves to be wherever we are. We can learn to entice ourselves towards growth through our interests - rather than punish ourselves for any perceived limitations - or pressure ourselves to be on the same timeline as other folks.
As a deeply sensitive person, the pressures of trying to keep-up and achieve society’s arbitrary milestones can feel impossible. Working towards achievements set up by the external world (that aren’t meaningful to our unique view) can feel confusing or impossible. For me, the answer was choosing to follow my own inner preferences - even if they were strange, embarrassing or immature according to our rigid cultural standards.
Your Spirit (or Inner-Knowing) is always at work - calling you towards the version reality that matches your deepest desires. It can take vulnerability and exploration to discover what really lights us up and brings true happiness.
Experimentation has been the best and most fun method for me. Go down rabbit holes and follow the random ideas that pop into you mind - if it feels good. Starting local can be a really nice way of creating in person connections with other curious-minded folks who share your interests. If that’s not a possibility - connecting on internet is just as good.
For me, the most intimidating part was shifting from the mindset of not knowing where to start or even what I was interested in. My best advice is to play with ideas and questions that work for your mind. Sometimes we have to play with different concepts to get our brains to get on board.
Here are a few suggestions to get you started:
If I did know what I wanted to explore, what might it look like?
How do I want to feel? Can I think of an activity or interest might support me in feeling those feelings?
What does my Spirit Love to do?
When I’m at my happiest, what am I doing? What am I thinking about?
When we take self-judgement and measuring ourselves against others out of the equation - a tremendous amount of emotional and mental space opens up. From that space we view ourselves more fully - and with more ability to appreciate our fascinating, curious, guided Self.
With Love,
Cam